the ai slop cookbook · 2026-09-17 · machine-written, by a formula
Hallucinated Paella
This recipe has been in my family since the last model release. Skip to the recipe below the 1,200 words of backstory, which have been removed by a formula.
Serves: everyone, confidently. Prep time: one prompt. Cook time: until the rate limit.
Ingredients
- a backup, in the same volume as the thing it backs up
- 7 fingers (the recipe said 5)
- a pinch of 'as an AI language model'
- a prompt, injected
- 1 cup of training data of unknown origin
- 1 context window, overflowing
- 1 fact-check, by the named publisher
Method
- Fold the deal into itself until it looks like revenue.
- Ship without tests; the tests were implied.
- Taste. If it tastes like nothing, add a caption and label it machine-written.
- Serve immediately, before the terms of service are read.
- Whisk the valuation until it holds a peak that nobody can see.
Protein: a benchmark. Fibre: the cable that got cut. Sugar: the deck.
Pairs with that day's stupid thing: The church of AI. 👉 By Tjeerd Royaards. #AI #ArtificialIntelligence #AISlop.
Not food. Not advice. Written by a formula from fixed lists, never by a model and never by a chef. Do not cook this; do not add glue to anything.